Summer Studies

 This summer, I had the BRILLANT idea that I could complete ALL of my chemistry classes in one attempt. Needless to say, it is T minus 14 days until the end of my semester, and I have 1 1/2 classes left to complete. One of which requires a research paper on an inorganic molecule and its uses. 

Here is where the ADHD comes in, and where I wish I could explain my self better to my mentors. I'm not in any way using this as an excuse. It is my responsibility as a student to overcome my challenges and produce the best material I can. However, that being said, they are challenges that are sometimes difficult for others to understand. I will do my best to explain:

             Research papers are the WORST!!!! Professors give you a topic (sometimes) and an open ended question. Very little direction. Where many would flourish with this, I struggle to get started. I have no clue where to start! And I am not an unintellegent person. I went through honors courses in high school and college. It's the organizational aspect (the BANE of my existance). Where 'normal' people can take their topic, and break it down into small pieces, and then tackle each of those small pieces one at a time, as much as I stare at the paper and try, I can't see it. It is one big piece to me. And it seems to huge and daunting. And I am so afraid to fail at it, I put it off. Hence, I am at 2 weeks and still haven't started it. I'm 28 years old, and have to go to my mother or my brother to help me break it in to manageable pieces in order to figure out where to start and what path to take in my research. I know they love me and don't mind helping, but it is still embaressing beyond belief! And we wonder sometimes why our students don't ask for help when they are struggling?!?! It's embaressing to have to have help for something that others your age do with relative ease. Especially when you try to talk to your instructors about your issues and their response is that you are just making a mountain out of a mole hill and you will be fine. I absolutely love my mentor, but in that moment, her encouragement just made me feel worse about myself. 

I know this post isn't about flipping, or about my personal classroom in any way. But as I was sitting in my bedroom on my Saturday, reading chapter after chapter on Geochemistry, I just felt this overwhelming need to post this. Most likely it is my ADHD acting up again and my need to distract myself from the big project I have to work on (that is what my family would tell you...lol), but at the same time, sometimes we need a reminder of the struggles our kids suffer through in silience. God Bless